FRESNO, NE–December 1st marks the beginning of the end of 2021. As such, many will take this time to look back and reflect on the remarkable year we’ll leave behind. Not TripAdvisor; they’re here to tell us what to look forward to in the upcoming year of infinite travel destinations. On Wednesday, the company dropped their annual “Fresno’s Top 3 Dry Cleaners To Watch” list for 2022. The contentious list covers the up-and-coming dry cleaner small business in Fresno and educates us about what makes them special and why we should be paying attention. We’re here to highlight the dry cleaners that managed to claw their way into this year’s top three.
Top Late-Night Dry Cleaner: Yes, We’re Open
Nobody is quite sure what this dry cleaner’s name is. The only signage reads “Yes, we’re open,” and that’s no lie. They are open any time of day, and for that reason, deserve to be on any Fresno tourist’s radar. One TripAdvisor user, Kelce Grammer, says: “This place never looks open, but they are. Just knock on the door, ask for Ronnie, and say ‘pumpernickel’ twice really fast. They can get any stain outta anything. No other place I’d go to when I spill hot dog barbecue sauce all over my suspenders at 2:45 A.M in the night. Trust me. We’ve all been there.”
Most Convenient: Mick Donald’s Drive-Thru Dry Cleaners
Mickey-D’s, as the locals call it, is the only spot for a fast and mediocre job. Need a mustard stain out of your blouse before your lunch break ends? Mickey-D’s will get that done for you in just 15 minutes, thanks to their state-of-the-art drive-thru window. Fresno resident Carmen Contreras wrote: “Oh shit! I ain’t been to Mick D’s in a minute. Fools got me out of a pinch. I crapped my white pants on a first date. I pretended to go to the bathroom but took my ass through Mick D’s drive-thru. They had my pants done in no time, and I got a Pepsi, too. They didn’t get the whole stain out, but at least it didn’t smell no more, and my date thought it was dirt.”
Least Hassle: Nicky The Cleaner
Hate useless small talk and nosy dry cleaners always asking what the stain is? If you don’t want your dry cleaner prying into your life, then go to Nicky. One Fresno visitor, AnonymousKillah, says: “No questions asked. That’s why I go to Nicky’s. It doesn’t matter if there’s blood all over your trousers or relish on your ascot; my boy’s got ya back. Nicky doesn’t give a shit, and he doesn’t say shit.”
Next time you find yourself in Fresno, keep this list in mind. You never know when a spill maple syrup on your tank top.