Insatiable Man No Longer Impressed By Scientific Achievement, Instead Upset By Things That Haven’t Been Invented Yet

Thoughtful man looking out the window

CAMBRIDGE, MA–Nothing surprises Dirk Weber these days. Five years ago, he was a doe-eyed MIT graduate, ready to wow the world with his engineering expertise. Dirk wanted to do something big, like inventing a cure for cancer, discovering the lost city of Atlantis, or being the first man on Pluto. It was all mapped out, and the future looked bright for the young, optimistic nerd.

Then COVID hit, and Dirk suddenly had too much spare time at home. He worked a meaningful engineering job for a budding cryptocurrency, but afterward, Dirk began watching a lot of movies. To say he was blown away by RoboCop would be a massive understatement. The high of watching something as incredible as a cyborg cop left Dirk feeling futile. “Watching RoboCop was like when you stare up at the stars at night, and it makes you feel so meaningless in comparison. Robocop made me feel like nothing man produces will ever be as impressive,” Dirk shared. 

Ever since watching RoboCop, Dirk is completely desensitized to any scientific or technological achievement. Jetpacks? Meh. Artificial intelligence? Underwhelming. Fully sequence the human genome? Whatever. Nothing moves the needle for Dirk anymore, and he may never be as happy again. “The whole thing has me reflecting on all the stuff that hasn’t been invented. As a child, I was promised things like flying cars and teleportation, and Playstation in the bathtub. Why does my phone battery die? Why won’t my watch make me invisible? Why do I floss? What primitive century am I living in? At this point, I’m just mad about what these scientists haven’t done.” 

Although he is not impressed by anything scientific these days, Dirk admitted he was “intrigued” by some of the animatronic technology at Disneyland.