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Category Archive: Lifestyle

‘It’ll Be Worth Its Weight In Gold!’ Insists Hustler Who Pawned Mom’s Gold To Buy NFTs From A YouTuber

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CINCINNATI, OH–Milton Herrera is a hustler through and through. Since dropping out of business school nine years ago, […]

April 6, 2022 Lifestyle, Local

Insatiable Man No Longer Impressed By Scientific Achievement, Instead Upset By Things That Haven’t Been Invented Yet

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CAMBRIDGE, MA–Nothing surprises Dirk Weber these days. Five years ago, he was a doe-eyed MIT graduate, ready to […]

April 2, 2022 Lifestyle

Window Seat Passenger Hydrating Way Too Much To Start Long-Haul Flight

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LOS ANGELES, CA–When Dante Hernangomez settled in for his 12-hour flight to Barcelona, he felt calm. Normally, air […]

March 30, 2022 Lifestyle

Office Pervert Purposely Not Wearing Green To Work On St. Patrick’s Day

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SAN DIEGO, CA–Saint Paddy’s Day is unequivocally Jeff Sullivan’s favorite holiday of the year. He loves everything about […]

March 17, 2022 Lifestyle, Local

‘It’s Missing Something’: Woman’s Underwhelming Everything Bagel Sheds Light On Rest Of Her Unfulfilled Life

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SEATTLE, WA–Chelsea Rivers had big plans in life. From a young age, she knew she was going places. […]

March 12, 2022 Food, Lifestyle, Local

‘That’s A True Story?’ Asks Lauren Boebert After Quietly Watching ‘National Treasure’ From The Doorway For The Last Hour

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WASHINGTON, D.C.–Following a controversial showing at President Biden’s State of the Union address, Rep. Lauren Boebert had herself […]

March 3, 2022 Entertainment, Lifestyle, Politics

Small Talk With New Co-Worker Quickly Exposes Her Belief That Ashton Kutcher Probably Drinks Baby Blood

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LOS ANGELES, CA–Amy Zhou has always been a considerate co-worker. She knows what it’s like to not have […]

February 16, 2022 Entertainment, Lifestyle, Local

‘Bernie Mac!’ Screams Boyfriend Pointlessly Naming Every ‘Ocean’s Eleven’ Actor As They Appear On Screen

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SAN ANTONIO, TX–Date nights have grown increasingly casual for Owen Michelob and his girlfriend, Stacy. At the beginning […]

February 9, 2022 Entertainment, Lifestyle

Proposed Spirit-Frontier Airline Merger Will Only Offer Middle Seats On Flights

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MIRAMAR, FL–When asked about the gold standard of in-flight experience, Spirit and Frontier Airlines are probably the first […]

February 8, 2022 Lifestyle, U.S.

Burnt-Out Physician Rewatching ‘Eyes Wide Shut’ To Remember Why He Wanted To Be A Doctor To Begin With

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NEW YORK, NY–Tristan Azubuike, M.D., has been an emergency medicine doctor for nearly ten years now. It’s never […]

February 7, 2022 Lifestyle

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