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Biden Administration Searching For Mathematically-Gifted MIT Janitor Who Solved Baby Formula

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CAMBRIDGE, MA–Two weeks ago, the White House enlisted the help of the world’s greatest mathematical minds, posting the […]

May 21, 2022 Politics, U.S.

Full-Bladdered Hunter Biden Surveys Coffee Shop For A Friendly Face To Keep An Eye On His Laptop

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MALIBU, CA–Even Sundays are workdays for Hunter Biden. As a successful attorney, international businessman, husband, Naval officer, and […]

April 11, 2022 Lifestyle, Politics, U.S.

Gas Shortage Solved? Man With Dislocated Finger Can’t Stop Farting After ‘Pull My Finger’ Joke Backfires

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LOS ANGELES, CA–Andrew Dillard is a relentless prankster. At any given moment, he’s got a whoopee cushion, fake […]

March 8, 2022 Local, U.S.

Biden Studying 1980 ‘Miracle On Ice’ Game Tape For Tips On Defeating The Russians

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WASHINGTON, D.C.–The world has a predicament on its hands. With Vladimir Putin moving forward with plans to invade […]

February 22, 2022 Sports, U.S., World

Iowa Preps For Tourist Surge As U.S. Lifts International Travel Ban

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DES MOINES, IA–More than 600 days after the United States instituted its initial COVID-19 travel bans, the floodgates […]

November 8, 2021 U.S.

‘At Least 90’: As Biden’s Approval Rating Drops, Democrats Seek Older Candidate To Rally Around For 2024 Election

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WASHINGTON, D.C.–Democratic Party leadership has been left scrambling for answers with the continued decline of President Joe Biden’s […]

November 2, 2021 Politics, U.S.

All Panda Express Locations Shutter Overnight As Eviction Moratorium Ends

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ROSEMEAD, CA–Tenants around the country were sent into a panic on Thursday following President Joe Biden’s decision to […]

July 31, 2021 Food, U.S.
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