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Time Capsule Buried By Founding Fathers Reveals Unexpectedly Accurate Prediction For Future Of Guns, Warning About Fidget Spinners

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PHILADELPHIA, PA–Construction workers building an expansion Wendy’s franchise downtown discovered something eye-opening on Thursday morning. While digging up […]

May 27, 2022 Politics, U.S.

GOP Officials Remind Public That Times Of Tragedy Are Not The Time To Do Anything About It

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UVALDE, TX–In the wake of yet another elementary school mass shooting, a supergroup of Texas officials, including Governor […]

May 25, 2022 Politics, U.S.

Justice Alito Doubles Down On Decision To Overturn Roe v. Wade With Experimental New ‘Addition By Subtraction’ Theory On Freedom

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WASHINGTON, D.C.–Following the leak of an upcoming decision to overturn Roe v. Wade, the Supreme Court has been […]

May 4, 2022 Politics, U.S.

Tender Moment At Supreme Court Confirmation Hearings As Ketanji Brown Jackson Helps Ted Cruz Sound Out Words From Baby Book

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WASHINGTON, D.C.–Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson’s nomination for the Supreme Court has made her the target of GOP scorn […]

March 23, 2022 Politics, U.S.

Tucker Carlson Confesses He Doesn’t Know What Adjectives Do After Airing ‘Sexy Extremist Pandas Born At Leftist Tokyo Zoo’ Segment

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NEW YORK, NY–The news media titan and self-proclaimed man of the people, Tucker Carlson, proved even he is […]

January 12, 2022 Entertainment, Politics

QAnon Follower Unsure Whether Jan. 6 Expiration Date On Eggnog Is Coincidence Or Secret Call To Arms

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LAFAYETTE, LA–Landry Broussard woke up this Christmas morning with his holiday cheer at an all-time low. On paper, […]

December 24, 2021 Lifestyle, Local, Politics, U.S.
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