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USA

‘It Made More Sense When Donald Trump Said It,’ Explains Woman Struggling To Articulate Her Newfound Support For Putin

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SAN ANTONIO, TX–Every time Susan and Vanessa get together, conversations inevitably turn political. It’s usually not much of […]

February 25, 2022 Politics, U.S.

As Covid Mandates Fade, This Patriot Recalls Exact Moment She Decided Never To Wash Her Hands Again

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LITTLE ROCK, AR–Ophelia Carter bleeds red, white, and blue. She also sneezes red, white, and blue, farts it, […]

February 24, 2022 Politics, U.S.

Small Talk With New Co-Worker Quickly Exposes Her Belief That Ashton Kutcher Probably Drinks Baby Blood

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LOS ANGELES, CA–Amy Zhou has always been a considerate co-worker. She knows what it’s like to not have […]

February 16, 2022 Entertainment, Lifestyle, Local

Proposed Spirit-Frontier Airline Merger Will Only Offer Middle Seats On Flights

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MIRAMAR, FL–When asked about the gold standard of in-flight experience, Spirit and Frontier Airlines are probably the first […]

February 8, 2022 Lifestyle, U.S.

‘Let’s See If Your Hand Is Bigger Than Your Face’ Says Homeopath Running Cancer Diagnostics

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FLAGSTAFF, AZ–Lindsay Irving had grown quite concerned with a lump she found in her breast over the weekend. […]

February 2, 2022 Lifestyle

‘Is That Your Leg?’ Asks Woman Repeatedly Kicking Boyfriend’s Shin Under The Table

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SAN JOSE, CA–Mindy Cabrera has been described as an exceptionally perceptive person by some of her peers. She […]

January 28, 2022 Lifestyle, Local

Nancy Pelosi Erases Congressional Reelection Concerns With Vow To Bridge The Gap Between Money And Politics

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WASHINGTON, D.C.–Nancy Pelosi sent shockwaves on Tuesday following the announcement of her intention to seek reelection in California’s […]

January 26, 2022 Politics, U.S.

‘Did You Try Benadryl?’: Insurance Claims Rep Troubleshoots Cancer Treatments They Are Actually Willing To Cover

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OAKLAND, CA–“Heroes work here.” That’s what Kelsey McAuley repeats to herself in the mirror every morning. She works […]

January 19, 2022 Local

‘Couldn’t Find HDMI Cables, But The New Glory Hole Works’ Writes Yelp Reviewer, Awarding Two-Star Rating To Defunct RadioShack Location

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BUFFALO, NY–Omar Bergman is set to host a movie night with several new friends on Saturday night. Unfortunately, […]

January 17, 2022 Local

Tucker Carlson Confesses He Doesn’t Know What Adjectives Do After Airing ‘Sexy Extremist Pandas Born At Leftist Tokyo Zoo’ Segment

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NEW YORK, NY–The news media titan and self-proclaimed man of the people, Tucker Carlson, proved even he is […]

January 12, 2022 Entertainment, Politics

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